...Getting Ready (by Sarah)

"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth (or very precious) in God's sight." 1 Peter 3

Last Tuesday before Bible study, I was sitting in our car at Elmer Park, getting my 'weekly chance to journal' while Ava napped in her carseat. When I came across this verse, I started to cry. I've heard it so many times in my life, but for whatever reason, it hit me in a fresh way. Perhaps it's because it's been such a transition for me to become a Mommy, and pretty much everytime I experience an adjustment in life, it brings me back to the same identity issues I've always dealt with. Where my 'adornment' comes from is one of my foundational identity issues. When I remembered that God loves a gentle and quiet spirit, that it's 'of great worth' or 'very precious' to Him, it touched something deep inside of me.

When I'm experiencing insecurities about my identity, I do tend to think my 'adorning' should come from something outward: my funny personality, my cute clothes, the skinniness (or not-so-skinniness) of my shape. They're all things I use to get people to like me, so that I'll know I'm ok in life. But God quietly reminded me that He values a gentle spirit. A quiet spirit.
And I know the difference between a gentle, quiet spirit, and a striving, insecure spirit. It just feels different. In how I act. In how I feel. In what I do. It feels like an 'inward adorning.' A beauty that's of great worth.

I realized that this reminder from God was easily applicable in the next part of my day. I spend a bunch of minutes in the morning getting ready: I get dressed, do my hair, eat...they're all things I do to get myself ready for my day. But I hardly ever get my spirit ready. However, I think God's heart for me, and God's heart for all women, is that we would take a few minutes before entering a situation and 'prep' our hearts before Him, so that we can rightly adorn ourselves.

So as I sat there, I reminded myself that I had two options before me. I could go into the Bible study room, ready to use the way that I am (my personality, my looks, etc) to my own advantage, in order to assuage my insecurities. Or I could go with the mindset that pretty much all women have insecurities and I have the opportunity to, with a quiet heart, put mine aside, and use the way that I am to add value to the women around me.

So I did it. It wasn't flashy. Probably no one noticed. But I used my strength and energy to make other women feel welcome, wanted, and valued. And I know that in God's sight, it was very precious.